If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
