We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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