Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
