This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
