ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
