hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
PANTIES FOUND
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