I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Randomize