every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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