i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
