look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
