Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
