So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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