she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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