Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
