I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
