I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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