If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
