I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
