That's intense
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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