Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
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