I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I need help removing her.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
