first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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