One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
