Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
