highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
