I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
A+ Viking dick
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