whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
i believe in u and ur pee
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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