Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
