porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
