We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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