Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
This house was built for laser tag.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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