oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
two words...techno handjob
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
