what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
This baby is an asshole
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Randomize
