Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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