brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
