Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just want nice things and good sex
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
