It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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