Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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