I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
