from now on my penis is your penis
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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