Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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