the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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