butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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