just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
You can't just leave with hair like that
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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