i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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