The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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