you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
