Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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