Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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