never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
