i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
