I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
